it's not about us.

It seems surreal that we only have a week and a half left here. I sincerely apologize for my lack of blog updates. They keep us insanely busy. The last five weeks have been exciting, challenging, tiring, growing, and fun all at once. Fort Collins is a beautiful city and I feel so blessed to have spent my summer here. As I told many of you in my letter and on my blog, my intent for going on this project was to get a feel for the operations side of campus crusade, but it has become so much more.

My job has been such a good experience. In the summers here at the CSU campus the Campus Crusade Staff Conference team takes place. I've served all summer on the Staff Conference Team, about 100 people who all work very hard at what they do. The conference itself is a 1 week event that kicked off yesterday, but for the 4 weeks prior to that different groups of staff must go through additional training.

I spent all summer working with the MTL (Missional Team Leaders, also known as campus directors, the people who are in charge of the movements on college campuses). I did anything for them that they needed done. I did a lot of ordering and calling for food and large group dinners. I wrapped welcome and thank you gifts. I ordered their daily snack and always made sure they had their water and coffee. It wasn't the most glamorous job, but I enjoyed being able to serve the people who spend the rest of the year faithfully serving students like me. I met so many amazing (and important, crulebrities if you will) people while serving with them this summer, which not a lot of college students get to do. How many people can say that the director of all campus ministry in the US knows their name? But that's not the important thing, the great thing was getting to spend time with these people and seeing God shine through them.

That's what I did for the last 4 weeks when only about 700-ish staff members were here in Fort Collins, but over the weekend over 5000 staff members have arrived for the big conference. There is so much to be done for this and it is amazing to see all of these people's talents and gifts come together to create something so cool.

With as large and as complex as this conference is, it is probably weird that I'm having trouble finding something to help with. The 4-week MTL training ended and so did my formal job, so for the next 2 weeks I could be able to help out where ever. However, the trend has been that no one needs help. I've done a few odd jobs but nothing steady. At first I found it pretty frustrating, here I am to serve and no one even wants me. But this morning as I sat in the first main session and saw everything go so flawlessly none other than Francis Chan reminded us about how IT'S NOT ABOUT US. I was so frustrated with not having a big job to do that I was dwelling on that. When all I should be dwelling on is how great it is that they don't need me. The conference is going smoothly... without me, because it's not about me. Praise God that they have more help than they need here!

I'm sure I will run into various things to do over the next couple weeks, but I am also blessed that I get to sit in the sessions and be touched by the same training as the crusade staff. This morning's session with Francis Chan was absolutely amazing and exactly what I needed to hear today. He had prepared an entirely different talk and threw it out the night before because he felt the spirit leading him in a different direction, so thankful he listened!

Okay, you're probably tired of reading and I want to thank you if you still are, and just ask for your prayers that the conference would continue to go smoothly, that the staff would be blessed, and that all the students on our project would continue to grow closer to God and to each other in these last days.

I'll leave you with this. All summer we've been studying Ephsians and one of the speakers today directed us to Revelation 2, a passage written to the church in Ephesus:
"Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first. Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place."
Revelation 2:4-5
Let us always pray that Jesus will be our first and only love, but even when we fail and we lose that love we had it is so freeing to know that his love for us is never shaken or changed.

In Christ,

Amanda